Wash It Down

You will want to remember the day.

You will want to be able to scroll it back up.   You will want to know the words you used.  You will be curious about the thoughts that wrinkled through your mind.  How suddenly the bravery appeared.  But, you’ll recall how sensitively you reminded yourself as you wrote this post, that there was no bravery required.

This agonizingly slow process has made it entirely possible to be bold in the context we’ve built between us, nine months later. Nine months of feasting on famine, starving on gluttony.  These are the saline-laced shores we have been sunning on and now the moon grows heavy and the sky grows dark and but the water stays placid and warm.

Should I know better?  Only time will tell if I will regret what I have so long assumed I could only regret given my imperfections and the imperfections inherent in the world?  As for now, I will take the compliments,  I will take the long-distance resolutions. I will take the way it feels to satisfy, to deluge, to surfeit, surely, a desire not of my own making.  To matter this much.

I liked it.  Twas good at it.  Will do it again.

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