We now have a new kitten in our lives. She is the antithesis of any negative emotion you or I might ever know. She just wants to love as aggressively as her little bug body can possibly allow. You make a motion and she needs to follow you, climb you, and rub her face on your face. She wants warmth and soft blankets and food and water and toys because all of those things mean to her that she is safe and loved. And it’s sort of charming to be able to deliver those things so readily and easily and have the reception be so instantaneous, so total.
She is three months old and we’ve decided after much thought and consideration (not Hortense, not Fart, not Harmonium) to call her Eleanor. She will be called Elly mostly(I intended Ellie, but she just feels like more of an Elly somehow) but as that is extraordinarily close to Lily, the other cat, we will probably often call her Nora or Eleanor Q. Rutherford the Third if she is is not being precisely good. Though it appears as though she will always be especially and particularly good.
I was not entirely expecting the whole energy to shift today, but yet it has. I also have learned that downing buckets of pineapple juice and just a shot or so of Malibu last night and eating nothing all day today is not good for me. At all. My body said sit down RIGHT NOW and stop leaping about. All of this adds to my impulse to be back on low-carb on the 1st.
We’ll see. I have that desire to take care of something, order something chaotic, and that would be a good one to work on. Especially as tomorrow, we go back to work, at least for a few hours and life continues unwinding the rest of this hideous year. Hideous, but for these points of light.
2 of the 3 markers are down for my mother’s cancer – it’s not growing, it’s stable. The doctor says it could take six months for the treatment to have its full impact, to reach, I suppose, that last marker. My mother came over and knelt on the floor and Eleanor, ball of love, bounced around and cuddled with her. I have to find some comfort in that image, in this continually unpromised time opening up for me day after day.
I don’t know. I get frustrated, as my beloved friends do sometimes, with how things go. Or seem to go when they run counter to what we’ve planned. I wanted to clean my room, to KonMari it, to sluice all of my clothes. It hasn’t happened yet and things are everywhere. I’ve got other plans on the boil, but not complete. And I could feel very strongly about my failures, but right now, I am glad for what’s been and what may yet come to pass.
Because there’s love. A bundle of it, and it doesn’t care who you are or what you’re doing, it just wants to play.