Word by word.
I am thinking about it. The girl by the telephone can at least wait for a ring, can attend to other things, can’t cradle it to her ear or anything in these terrible lengthy pauses in our conversation. I feel as though I want to know the moment it arrives (assuming it will) and so I, obsessively, glance at the number in my inbox for a tick upwards.
Paying this much attention to it…well, you run the risk of thinking that is the only thing that is going on. It’s not, of course, it just feels that way.
And until there’s another word, another rung, another vote of confidence…there’s just me stacking clouds and clicking refresh.
Work. My event is starting to get the tiniest bit of steam which is necessary and important. Everyone’s really chipper and optimistic, but I’ve seen these things deflate mid-stream and nobody seems to know why. But why is because right now, things aren’t coming together. The planning has been secondary to me just being sure I’ve got everything rolling with my basic responsibilities. I’ve got one maybe now, though, from a chocolatier, which is more than I had yesterday, and lots of support from the boss. So, we forge ahead.
Writing. Well. There’s an area that needs some attention.
Body. I continue to have one. Every time I do the hypnosis, I feel some benefit, but lately, as with everything, I’m rushed. We go to the store after work and that means I eat later and I’m caffeinated with this tea, but then I strain my brain for an hour to work out my five hundred words, and even knowing how important it is to getting this diet moving in the right direction, I don’t carve out any time for exercising. If I’m honest, I’m outright refusing. And I have all these ways to do it where I could even get on the bike with my xbox controller for my computer and run myself all over the Hinterlands while I cycle about and nope. I’m not. My little sister did email me today and mention trying a free cycling/yoga class where I guess they turn out the lights and turn on certain music and I’d like to try it. It, like so many other things I should try, does come with a tail. If I enjoy it, it means trying to coordinate the getting there on a regular basis, or paying the exorbitant amount of money it would cost after we do this free class.
But I figure, it is something. And it’s a free something.
Fuck my hands are stiff. I’m typing way too slow for comfort.
I am also completely despondent that Parks and Rec is over. No spoilers, please, because I won’t be able to watch it until it’s posted on Hulu tomorrow, but wow, that show has leavened many a night in my anchor of a brain.
So, yeah, off we go towards a tomorrow, and who knows, maybe a letter.