I am somewhat sure that in the archives is a post called Vox Populi. I checked and…apparently not. Perhaps another blog, another time. Which fits, I think with the game from which I’ve filched the title, my dear new (only to me) Bioshock Infinite. I’ve done my best to take breaks today and clean counters and re-apply blankets to couches and empty the dishwasher, etc. Also, I’ve been distracted by the snowtide which has seemed to come in and out on our shores and what had melted off and left black asphalt has now returned and coated nearly everything in white again. However, now I’ve been pulled pretty deeply into the magic of the game world so I have to be mindful of the time and my hunger and caring for myself.
I told myself, self, I said, dear self, if you’re going to pause the game, then you’d ought to take a moment and write a hundred words or so and then go back to playing so that the job will be done sooner rather than later and you’ll be back to devoting your full attention to this compelling universe. Better that than raging at yourself for not being able to make a storm pattern move out of the sky.
I suppose of note is I think today is the 1500th post on this blog. I have been blogging daily essentially since January 1, 2010, though there were thirteen or so posts that were written in 2008 and 2009 before I had the epiphany that demanded this task of me. It has helped, or at least it has never hurt, though some nights I’ve been sick and some nights I’ve been miserable with pains not of the flesh. It has been a constant and it’s important, in my estimation, to now and again put down in words the value of being somewhere, on paper, every day. That I’m doing something – something that feels right to me even if it isn’t curing cancer or fighting terrorists or travelling to the moon.
My confidence is the thing it gives me.
And so with confidence, I can report that this diet thing is happening at the moment. I cannot speak to forevers, forevers are a mighty long time away from now, and I can say that I have done it imperfectly, with diet aids and salted meats, but I feel better. In most ways. When you sit in one spot stewing in your own anxieties, the spoilage is fairly unavoidable, but I’m more than ready to cut out the oxidized bits and continue tomorrow with these good thoughts in mind. Got another whole day of weekend, got a Super Bowl party, got more to do and play and be and feel. So yeah, it isn’t as sour as it felt an hour ago as I was sitting in the dark, gaming away.
Since I’m going to Italy and there may be the tiniest chance that I’ll have an excuse to tack on going to England for that trip, any and all of this is going to pay off. It’s not just for some boy or for some future I keep shunning, it’s for a real situation where everything will be benefited by a strong body, an open heart, and lots of this confidence coming from all sides.
Boo meet yah?
Okay, that’s the worst. I’m going now. For REAL.